When Loved Ones Don’t Understand Your Health Journey (and Why You Should Keep Going)

A theme I notice often — both in my patients and in myself — is the pushback that can come from loved ones when we begin a transformation journey.

Let’s take body recomposition as an example: the process of losing fat while maintaining or gaining muscle, whether through lifestyle changes, medication, bariatric surgery, or a combination of these tools. Most people start this journey to improve their health, confidence, physical ability, or mental well-being — and naturally expect support from those closest to them.

But the truth is, support isn’t always guaranteed. And when it’s missing, it can make you question whether to move forward with your decision to change.

Before I share why you still get to choose yourself and your transformation, let’s explore a few reasons why loved ones may not offer support — or may withdraw it once your changes become visible.

1. They care about you — and fear the risks.

The subconscious mind often interprets the unknown as danger. Even positive change can feel unsafe to those watching from the outside.

Your loved ones may genuinely worry about risks or complications and believe that staying the same is safer — even if you’re unhappy. Their intentions may be loving, but their fear can sound like discouragement.

2. They’re afraid of losing the version of you they know.

Transformation requires change — and the version of you that got you here won’t get you there.

When you start altering your habits, routines, and boundaries, it shifts the dynamics of your relationships. If you and a friend always bonded over dining out or sharing desserts, that ritual may no longer fit your new lifestyle. Change can feel like distance, and that fear of “losing” you can show up as resistance.

3. You’re a mirror — and that can be triggering.

When you start following through on your goals and honoring your values, it can remind others of where they’re not doing the same.

Your progress becomes a mirror reflecting their own unmet desires or postponed dreams. This isn’t about malice — it’s discomfort. Sometimes, rather than face that reflection, people unconsciously reject your results.

4. You’ve outgrown old patterns of connection.

If your bond has centered on venting, commiserating, or making “Monday plans to start over,” your new consistency can leave an empty space.

When you no longer need to vent or plan because you’re doing the thing, that pattern breaks — and some loved ones may instinctively pull away. Again, not from bad intent, but from self-protection and uncertainty about how to relate to you now.

5. Change is uncomfortable — for everyone.

We love the idea of change — vision boards, new planners, fresh starts — but our nervous systems crave familiarity.

Even witnessing someone else’s transformation can create subconscious unease. It challenges the brain’s sense of safety, and the quickest way to feel safe again is to stop the change. That’s often what underlies resistance or criticism from people who care about us.

Why You Still Get to Choose You

Radical Self-Love

You have a desire, a vision, and a right to honor them.

True self-love isn’t indulgent — it’s a deep act of respect. It means putting your oxygen mask on first so you can be fully resourced for others.

Self-love is not about buying the next trendy item or taking a trip you can’t afford — it’s about caring for your body, your mind, and your joy. Practicing radical self-love helps you create the life you want and models for others that it’s okay to do the same.

Be the Change You Want to See

When you choose yourself and stay committed to your transformation, you become a living example of what’s possible. You prove to yourself — and to others — that change is not only survivable but liberating.

Your courage can inspire ripple effects far beyond what you’ll ever see.

Know Your Worth

You are worthy of joy.

You are worthy of health.

You are worthy of confidence.

You are worthy of trying something new.

You are worthy of being supported on your journey.

You are worthy. You are worthy. You are worthy.

I hope this message serves you in some way.

If someone you know is navigating a similar journey, please share this with them.

And if you’d like me to write more about how to navigate resistance from loved ones during transformation, let me know — I’d love to explore that in a future post.